Do you intend to write your own wedding vows instead of repeating those of your officiant? Get on the same page with your future spouse and decide on the tone you want to establish for the ceremony. You could choose to write your vows jointly, speaking the same lines as a pair to one another on the big day. Alternatively, you may want to keep your words secret until the wedding ceremony, utilizing the wedding preparation process to work on promises, memories, and a devotion to your partner. We will go over some of the essential tips for writing your wedding vows to help you convey the love that you and your future spouse share.

Making Sure That Everyone Is On The Same Page

Consult with your future spouse and the officiant to ensure that everyone is on board with unique wedding vows. Some faiths demand you to utilize the conventional phrasing, while others allow you to create your own as long as specific terms are included. You’ll also want to make sure that your partner is willing to participate. You will also want to determine if you wish to write a single set of wedding vows that you’ll both recite or if you want to write them separately.

Get Inspiration

Being inspired is the perfect method to write your wedding vows. Make a playlist of love songs, read old notes to each other, or look at old pictures. Walking down memory lane might be an effective strategy for getting into the “mood” and getting the words flowing. Reading poetry, novels, or even watching a romance movie is another fantastic approach to feeling inspired. You may also want to watch videos or read wedding vow examples from others.

Helpful Questions

Answer questions in a quiet place with paper and a pen. Even if you don’t believe the response will be included in your wedding vows, write it down. It might be beneficial in the long term. If you’re experiencing writer’s block, consider taking a rest first. If you’re still stuck, try reciting the answers into a tape recorder while allowing your ideas to flow freely.

  • What is the greatest thing about your future spouse?
  • What does marriage mean to you?
  • When did you know you wanted to marry this person?
  • Why do you want to marry this person?
  • What is your favorite memory?
  • What do you want to promise your spouse?
  • How will marriage life be different?
  • What will stay the same during your marriage?

Use A Wedding Vows Template

If you’re writing your vows individually, it’s good to agree on a general style ahead of time so that one person’s vows don’t vary dramatically from the other’s. You may decide to make the same number of promises to each other, or you could choose something more precise, such as a word count or how long they take to recite.

If you want to stick to the same structure, you might use a template.

Make It Personal

Whether you want to make your partner (and guests) laugh or cry, write your vows as though you’re just speaking to your future spouse. Unlike a toast or regular public speaking, this should be seen as a one-on-one discussion and devotion rather than a performance. While we recommend using stories, jokes, and language that most people can understand, integrating personal moments will set your vows apart from the others.

Do Not Rush

Planning a wedding may quickly become overwhelming, so take a few moments to reflect on why you’re doing it. Allowing yourself time to write your wedding vows will allow you to think about them and edit them rather than being pressured and rushed. Inspiration may come at any moment, and if you’ve already started, it will be simpler to build on what you’ve got.

Keep It Short and Sweet

Maintain a limit of 2-3 minutes for your wedding vows, and don’t be afraid to jot down your ideas to make your vows clear and focused. Your intentions might easily get muddled by the length. Maintaining eye contact with your partner whenever feasible helps keep the atmosphere personal.

If you’re having difficulty condensing ideas, write the remainder in a private message to your spouse to read before (or after) the ceremony.

Practice Reciting Your Wedding Vows

To begin, read your writing aloud to a trusted friend or family member. Ideally, this person will be familiar with your relationship. They may have helpful recommendations, or just reading them aloud may help you spot areas for improvement.

Once you’ve completed the final draft, read it aloud to ensure that you’re comfortable with it. If possible, attempt to memorize it. Regardless of your ability to memorize, make notes of your wedding vows on a notecard and provide an additional copy to the best man or maid of honor. This will ensure that you are extra prepared in case of nerves.